Don't walk into that store; they might suck you in.

My blog recently went through some memory loss so had to restore all my posts with fake dates. :|

I apologize for the loss of comments. Actually, I'll stop apologizing this time. Go ahead and beat me with a boat. Anyway! Ever had a chance to piss someone off just because you didn't find what you wanted?

If you're still wondering, I'm talking about the time when we enter a store and we're looking for something but we don't see it. The store people go on parading their collection and we go "Nyah..". It's better than ignoring the store people when they chase you for 10 blocks asking, "Would you like to buy something?" The shopping malls are better off though. You just walk by and no one even bothers to look at ya. Whether you buy anything or not, they just don't care. God!I missed being chased around. :|

Now, it's one thing when you're an ignorant customer but a pissed off customer can get on your nerves. Example: Me. :|

Scene- At a shoe store.

Salesman: What kind of shoes are you looking for?

Me: Erm, let me have a look at them myself.

*after a lot of checking out*

Me: This is it? That's all you got? Your stock sucks!

Salesman: Ma'am, we've got some exquisite designs..

Me: Yeah yeah, save the lecture. Show me that pair *pointing out to one*

*after trying it on*

Me: These hurt my ankles.

Salesman: Ma'am, with all due respect, you've said the same for the last 30 pairs I showed you.

Me: You think I'm lying?

Salesman: I think I have something that'd hurt you less.

Me: Then what are you waiting for? Go get 'em!

*gets a nice pair and it fits me fine*

Me: Ah, nice! Keep the store running. *about to leave..*

Salesman: Whoa whoa whoa! Aren't you going to buy this, ma'am?

Me: When did I say that I wanted to buy something?

*he looks really mad*

Me: What?!

Salesman: Then.. *confused* I can show you some better pairs if you want.

Me: Sure, go ahead.

Salesman: Will you buy any?

Me: Jeez, no.

Salesman: *stares blank* Why do you want me to show our collection then?

Me: Can't I have a look at them without buying any?

Salesman: No! Our motto is if you look at them, buy 'em!

Me: I hope your motto applies only to shoes. :|

Moral: Never walk into a store wishing you'll get out just fine.

I watch the movies all by myself.

Friend: Ana, do you want to watch this new movie?

Me: Oh, I don't go to the movies.

Friend: I'm sorry. What?!

Me: Yeah yeah, I download every new movie via torrents and watch them all by myself.

Friend: You make me sad.

Me: No, I've a reason.

And I start explaining to my friend why..

It's a lovely day. I'm at the movies. The lights dim down and this clip starts playing on the screen. Everyone's quiet and busy watching what's about to happen. I'm too into the scene and all my ears and on those dialogues. Everything's fine until my friend pops up at every interval..

Friend: What did he say now?

*after a few minutes*

Friend: Hey, who's the mother?

*the very next second*

Friend: Do you happen to know her name? OMG! She's wearing a pink gown. You know I have the exact same..

Me: *glaring at my friend*

Friend: Umm, what?

Me: I'm trying to watch a movie here. :|

*after a few minutes*

Friend: What did she say now? Why is she going after him?

*after a few minutes*

Friend: *poking at my arm* What did he say? What did he say? *giggles*

Me: *about to explode but then I calm down* I'll explain it to you later.

*almost at the climax scene when the guy is trying to tell the girl something and..*

Friend: Hey! I'll just go to the washroom.

Me: Will you SHUSH?!

Man at the back: Will you two girls SHUSH?!

My friend was louder than the movie. Every once in a while people kept staring at us which made me uncomfortable. I even tried sending her to get a pack of popcorns but she came back really fast. :|

Sometimes, when I take a friend who happens to have watched the movie already and keeps dictating the next scene, I feel like stabbing that person.

So, I decided to never go to the movies and rather watch them at home. We ordered this movie on our cable and my parents were watching it with me.

Dad: *right in the middle of a dialogue scene* I knew this scene was coming up. What bad direction! I can write a script myself!

The muffin guy - III

My friend and I decided to go to this park. It's a huge park. We took a bus all the way to the landmark. As soon as we landed there, I mentioned my name and I was offered TWO park tickets for free. And we both entered the park as if Bambi was learning to walk for the first time. Wondering, confused, watching around and then we found this seat and just sat there. After a while, we saw a bunch of kids playing "Ringa Ringa Roses''. Aww, it was so sweet! I decided to give ''the muffin guy'' a call..

He: Hey, so are you at the park?

Me: No, I'm in states waiting for you.

He: *laughs* I'll be right there.

After a while, he spotted us..

He: *proceeded for a handshake* Hello!

My friend: Uhh hmm, hello! *she was almost about to faint*

Me: Hey there! How come we got TWO free tickets?

He: First of all, HI! You suck at conversation starters. Second of all, I knew you'd bring a friend along.

My friend: *whispering to me* He's so yum!

Me: *to my friend* Shut up. *to him* Thank you again, for the tickets.

He: *to my friend* What's your name dear?

My friend: Nnn..N.. *I pinch her elbow* Nandini. And you?

*I give him a look because we haven't exchanged names yet*

He: Well.. you'll know it soon. Shall we?

Both of us: Sure.

Me: Wait wait, shall we what?

He: Would you relax? Just come.

He took us to this teeny tiny party hut with bushes and shrubs all around. It felt like heaven. I wanted to stay in that garden paradise forever. There was this cake placed on a table and the kids gathered all around it. The cake had "Happy Birthday, Rehaan'' gelled on it. Yes, it was the muffin guy's birthday. And now I knew his name. He entered with a bunch of candles and let the kids plug those on the cake.

Me: *to him* Erm, rehaan?

He: Yes! That's my name.

Me: Happy Bir..

My friend: *interrupts me* HAPPY BIRTHDAY *screams*

He: *laughs* Thank you, dear.

Me: Happy Birthday, Mr. Rehaan.

He: Just call me rehaan.

Me: So, you're *counting the candles* sixteen eh?

He: You should get an award for your PJs. I'm twenty four. I wanted to place one candle but the extra ones are just for the kids to blow.

We all sang the birthday song. They even ordered pizza and biriyani. Everyone had their own preference. It was a small party for the kids. There was music. There were games!

I felt kinda bad because I didn't even get a gift or anything. But why should I? I hardly knew this person and he invited me to his birthday. That was huge! Or, maybe it wasn't ..No no, it was huge! And so I kept thinking.

My friend: This guy is so cute! I think I'm in love with him.

Me: Nandu, I'm so glad I brought you with me.

My friend: Let's invite him for a treat. We must treat him.

Me: Why don't you ask him out? That'd be a treat for him.

My friend: I'm serious!

Me: When did I say I was joking?

*He overheard us*

He: What's going on? What are you both talking about?

Me: Umm..I feel kind of bad that I couldn't get you a gift.

He: What?! You girls are unbelievable. Why do you worry so much about stuff? Just enjoy the party! I've another surprise after this.

Me: Look, Mr Rehaan..

He: It's just rehaan.

Me: Yes, rehaan! You've done a lot for me and my friend apparently. I think any more surprises would just..

He: Look, *trying to motion a name* .. You haven't told me your name yet.

My friend: What?! Her name is..

Me: Anamika.

He: *smiles* Okay, that's a nice name. Anamika, just stop thinking and let me do this.

Me: Alright, if you say so.

The party was almost about to get over and he came up to my friend and gave her two tickets to the movie "Avatar".

My friend: *almost hugged him* Oh! Thank you! Thank you so much, rehaan!

He: You're welcome, Nandini.

Me: Thank you.

He: What are you thanking me for?

Me: Erm, for the movie tickets.

He: Those aren't for you. They are just for nandini and anyone she gets to bring. *motions to my friend* Do not take anamika to the movie.

Me: *almost about to get mad because I wanted to watch avatar* Alright, fine!

He: *gives me a wicked smile* Don't be mad, dear.

And we were about to take off..

He: Alright, so this was fun. It was nice to meet you, nandini. And I'll see you later, anamika.

My friend: It was nice meeting you too.

Me: See me later? Where?

He: You can't even bid a goodbye, can you?

Me: Hmph! Goodnight, rehaan.

We were at the bus stop and he sms-ed me to meet him at the gate once. I asked nandini to wait for me and I rushed back.

Me: What is it?

He: *gives me a black envelope* Open it.

I opened it and found a ticket to Shaan's musical in Dubai's new year's eve party. I was so happy!

Me: OMG! You must be really rich.

He: No, I'm organizing this event. That's my night time job. I'll see you at the concert. Will keep you on the VIP list. And this is a date. Don't bring any more Nandinis with you.

Me: *kept looking at him in a weird way* Huh?

He: Don't do that. Goodnight *smiles*

I end the muffin guy series right here because I discovered his name. Rehaan asked me out. And I bored you all to death. Please visit iThoughts again :|

P.S: Don't ask me what excuse I made to my parents to go to this park.

P.P.S: I don't think I should go. Give me suggestions on how to be polite and say ''no'' :|

The muffin guy - II

And I haven't been to work since a week now so I decided to give this muffin goon a call.

Me: Hello?
He: Yes?
Me: The muffin guy? [I never thought I'd call someone that]
He: Ah, the blueberry girl! [Didn't know he kept a nick for me :|]
Me: Hehe, yes.
He: Well, you know what they say. Anything for free food!
Me: What?! Hey! No. I didn't call you to get a free muffin. You think I can't afford a muffin?
He: Ssshh, calm down girl. I didn't mean to say that. Umm.. please don't be mad. So why did you call?
Me: I don't know.
He: Why don't you know?
Me: I wish I knew.
He: Wow, you're one confused nut. Alright, are you free this weekend?
Me: No no, I've got meetings with Mr. President.
He: I hear ''yes''. Let's meet on friday. I can pick you up and..
Me: Before you go dreamshooting, I don't meet random guys just like this.
He: I'm not random. I'm the muffin guy.
Me: Are you asking me out?
He: No but I wish I could. [what was that?!] Every friday, I go to this park in Dubai to spend some time with children. We invested into this orphanage and I think you should come. It'll be a good change for you.
Me: What a load of crap! Nice way to impress a girl. And do you think I'm jobless all week waiting for invitations?
He: Well, do you have any other plans?
Me: ...Noo. But still :|
He: Oh c'mon! Don't you wanna see a child playing around and smiling?
Me: Yeah, I do but if my parents know this, they'll kill the child in me.
He: Alright. I won't pick you up. Why don't you come by yourself? I'll pay for your park ticket.
Me: Okay, that sounds fair. And you don't need to pay for the ticket.
He: Don't worry, I've got a job.
Me: Thanks for poking.
He: Great, so I'll see you on friday.
Me: Sure.
He: And if you don't come...*pause*.. there's pretty much nothing I can do. It'll really mean a lot to me if you come.
*we hang up*

I started thinking whether I should go.. but then I decided to bring a friend along with me so I'm going =P
More after the park meet..

The muffin guy.

At the starbucks counter near my office..

He: Excuse me miss, can I have a blueberry muffin to go please? Thanks a lot.
Me: Can I have the same?
Counter-Lady: Sorry ma'am. This gentleman got the last piece.
*disappointed*

Me: Alright, get me a banana muffin.
*appears from behind*
He: Let me get that for you..
Me: Oh really, that's okay.
He: Hey c'mon. It's only fair. I took your favourite muffin.
Me: No, really. You don't have to do that *looking at the price*..on second thoughts, I appreciate chivalry.
He: *laughs* No, chivalrous would be me giving you the muffin you wanted. The shameless jerk that I am..I love blueberry muffins.
Me: Thanks a lot.
He: My pleasure. So you work here?
Me: An intern. What about you?
He: Why are we standing? Let's get a seat..

*after being seated*
He: Yeah, I'm working with Google. Fresher!
Me: Well, you look fresh!
*he's puzzled*
Me: I mean to say I got what you meant.
He: No problem. I liked your PJ. So, what's next for you?
Me: After internship? Job hunting. Oh, wait a minute, that's already on.
He: You're funny.
Me: Thanks. I get that a lot.
He: You're charming. I bet you get that a lot too.
Me: Wow, you're really good at this.
He: Gimme a break! I'm just making conversation. *gives me a wicked smile*
Me: I'm sorry. I apologize. I've to get going now.
He: It was nice meeting you. Did we exchange names yet?
Me: I don't have one. *grinning*
He: Neither do I. Here's my card. Call me if you need a muffin.

More later..

Awkward Chat Moments

Case A : When you type a lot and get one liner replies.

BlabberBird : Hey! I missed you so much. I had work all day. So how are you?

TheRobot : Better.

BlabberBird : Okay. How was your day?

TheRobot : Fair.

fifteen minutes later

TheRobot : Yourself?

BlabberBird : I had a great day. * describe my whole day in a paragraph *

TheRobot : Good.

BlabberBird : Alright then I'll catch you later? You take care and have a great day.

TheRobot : Ditto.

Case B : When both are numb.

ShushBird 1 : Hi.

ShushBird 2 : Hello.

few minutes later

ShushBird 1: Later.

ShushBird 2 : Later it is.

Case C : When one gets disconnected a LOT.

ChatBird : Hey! It's been a while since I saw you online.

DcBird : I know! It has been so..

DcBird is offline.

DcBird : Sorry! I got disconnected. So how've you been?

ChatBird : I've been really good. How are you?

DcBird is offline.

DcBird : I'm so sorry! I got dc again. My net is messed up.

ChatBird : Ah, that's okay.

DcBird : What did you ask?

ChatBird : I asked : How are you?

DcBird is offline.

DcBird : Sorry again! I got..

ChatBird : Yeah, I know you got dc.

DcBird : He he. I am fine. How was your day?

ChatBird : Well my day was.. * types a whole big paragraph and suddenly realizes that DcBird got dc again *

DcBird is offline.

DcBird : My net is totally dashed up! Can you copy paste?

ChatBird : Umm, well. Sure. Can I ask ...

DcBird is offline.

ChatBird :.. when are you getting disconnected again?

Case D : When one forgets and the other remembers.

Amnesiac : How are you?

I-Remember-Bird : You asked me that twenty minutes ago.

Amnesiac : Oh, I did? What happened then?

I-Remember-Bird : You got busy.

Amnesiac : Oh! Sorry. So how's work?

I-Remember-Bird : You asked me that too.

Amnesiac : Oh! Then why am I talking to you again?

I-Remember-Bird : You never asked me that.

Amnesiac : :|

Case E : When one BRB[s] a lot.

JustABee : I wanted to tell you something.

BeeRBee : BRB.

JustABee : Oh okay.

after a few minutes

BeeRBee: Back!

JustABee : Alright, so..

BeeRBee : Hey, wait! BRB

JustABee : Uh huh.

after a few minutes

BeeRBee : Back!

JustABee : Welcome back.

BeeRBee : So what were you saying?

JustABee : I wanted to say that..

BeeRBee : I'm so sorry. My friend called. BRB

JustABee : Forget it.

BeeRBee : Back!

BeeRBee : Are you there?

JustABee : BRB.

Case F : When one is busy and the other is jobless.

DoingNothingBird :

Ping!

Ping!

Ping!

*BUZZ*

Ping!

Ping!

Where are you?!

BusyBee : I'm a leetle busy.

DoingNothingBird : You're always busy! You don't have 2 minutes?

Ping!

Ping!

*BUZZ*

DoingNothingBird is blocked.

Case G : When one is serious and the other is not.

User A : I missed you a lot.

User B : Hey! Did you know a movie is coming up with that title?

User A : Oh. I didn't. But I really missed you.

User B : I know what you mean! I miss chocolates a lot.

User A : Do you think I'm joking?

User B : No, I certainly don't. And I'm not joking about missing chocolates either :S

Will I bell or sell the CAT?

With the CAT trauma in my head and everything, I thought of calling up a friend who already had her exam on the second day..

Friend: The exam was Uhh-mazing!

Me: That's great. Did they feed you cookies during the exam or..

Friend: No no, really. It went great. I never experienced something like this before.

Me: What? You never gave exams before?

Friend: This was ONLINE!

Me: Wokay. Stop wasting my international credits and gimme the real detail.

Friend: Well, the first few questions were good because I skipped 'em.

Me: :|

Friend:..And then the next few were about to appear but my system restarted.

Me: :| :|

Friend: Anyway, so after I was done with the quants section, I was shifted to another center because the server crashed at mine

Me: ..Ohhkay, should I be scared or this is some kind of joke?

Friend: I'm serious. Just be cool because by the time your date comes I'm sure it'll all be just fine.

Me: Of course. Wouldn't hurt you to say it once in a while.

Friend: And don't freak out if you don't get your results after the exam.

Me: *about to hang up* Whoa whoa whoa, what? What do you mean by that?

Friend: Well, it just happened to one of my friends. His system crashed when he was about to save his answers. He failed to do so. You don't worry at all though.

Me: *coming out all squeaky* Uh huh.

Friend: All the best :D

Me: Yeah, right!